Entries from December 2007 ↓

The world is a crazy place. At times, so is Hawaii. As I write this, nearing midnight on December 31, 2007, our neighborhood is ablaze with thunderous explosions, flashing lights, and thick smoke. It will only get worse.

Hawaii’s tradition of fireworks will cause untold grief for hundreds of thousands of residents in congested neighborhoods, and maim dozens more in dangerous explosions.

Why? Tradition.

What? Evil spirits are aroused and frightened by fireworks, right? Celebrations require loud noise, danger, and physical damage, right?

Wrong. Fireworks in the hands of common man, and in the hands those who can least afford them, is a tradition whose time has come and gone. It is time to ban the sale of fireworks and relegate the spectacular visual effects of fireworks to the professionals and special occasions.

Why? Safety. Neighborhood fireworks provide no benefit to neighbors. They’re dangerous. They’re expensive. They’re noisy and offensive and pose a health hazard. Did I mention they’re dangerous?

How can reasonably intelligent (which assumes that those who use fireworks are neither reasonable, nor intelligent) citizens obtain a ban on personal fireworks? How about a referendum? A vote?

Now we’re on to something. A referendum is a vote by the electorate on a single political question referred to them by authorities for a direct decision. A referendum posed to registered voters would result in a ban of personal fireworks.

Alas, it is not to be. In the absence of lawmakers capable of enacting laws beneficial to Hawaii’s residents, the mere thought of a referendum on issues sends shivers down the spineless areas of the non-absent lawmakers.

Few landmarks in Hawaii carry more prominence and visibility than Diamond Head. Even tourists to Hawaii know about Diamond Head, though few know why the extinct volcano is so named.

Regardless, Diamond Head, mostly unchanged in modern times, (after all, it’s a big hole of rock, so to speak) transforms each year. From late spring to early fall, Diamond Head is dusty and dry, a forlorn landmark that stands out like a sore and visibly dry thumb from the lush green of nearby Kapiolani Park.

In fall and winter the rains come. Diamond Head begins a transformation from an arid rock in paradise to an arid rock in paradise covered in a thriving, luxuriously green band of vegetation. It’s beautiful.

As with Hawaii’s daily sunsets, Diamond Head’s winter beauty doesn’t last. Dry weather and increased sunshine force the green band to retreat into a hibernation. While island residents sweat through a long dry summer, seemingly lengthened by the effects of global warming, Diamond Head’s beauty slumbers, only to be awakened by by the winter tears of nature.

I walked to the front of our condo and picked up the mail today. On the way back I saw someone on the side of our building, digging through the trash near the dumpster.

My first thought was to let him be. Digging through trash can’t be the best way to find dinner, regardless of circumstances, but it’s far too common these days. From what I could see, he had both dumpster doors open and trash scattered all over the area, so I turned around and walked back down, willing to to usher the digger off the property.

“Hey, do you live here?” was my manly shout, announcing my presence. “No, I live next door. Sorry, I’m looking for bottles and cans,” was his quick and courteous reply.

He smelled of alcohol and hadn’t shaved in a day or two. He was wearing tennis shoes, shorts and glasses. A cell phone hung on a lanyard around his neck.

“You need to move on back next door and don’t leave a mess,” I said, again with the commanding voice.  “Oh, no mess at all. I understand a appreciate and respect your property. I was just separating bottles and cans from the trash,” he said meekly, but he looked me in the eyes.

Indeed, the dumpster area appeared messy from a distance, but viewing it all up close I could see he had diligently segregated glass bottles into a plastic bag, cans into another, plastic bottles into a third, while rummaging through another.

I looked into his face for what seemed like half a minute but was probably far less. “Found anything worthwhile,” I asked? He looked down at the bags beside the dumpster, and said, “A little of everything, I guess. Bottles and cans. Some guy left nearly a case of Bud Light cans.”

Again I stared into his face as if searching for some hint of danger or defiance. What I saw looking back at me was a man who needed to eat today, and was willing to dig through trash to find enough for the next meal.

“I’ve got some bottles and cans and things,” I said, as I turned and walked away. He continued to dig through his assortment of bags as I left.  Moments later I returned with four small bags of glass bottles, aluminum cans, and plastic bottles, and a couple of pictures of Abe Lincoln.

“Here,” I said, “these are for you, including this.” I handed him the bags and the five dollar bills. “Don’t drink your dinner. Eat something good tonight.”

He smiled and said, “thanks,” then turned back to sort the additional bottles and cans into their appropriate plastic bags. That’s a rough way to make dinner.

There’s a war going on that you seldom hear about or read about, but it may change how you hear and read about everything in the future. It’s the war of atoms vs. bits.

I was searching the web for news about Hawaii and came across the Hawaii Tribune Herald’s web site. The Tribune-Herald newspaper covers Hilo and Kona on the Big Island.

Just like the Honolulu Advertiser and Star-Bulletin on Oahu, the Hawaii Tribune-Herald sells newspapers. You buy the atoms which make up the paper. Advertisers buy ad space in the newspaper, readers buy the newspaper to read the news and the ads. It’s the circle of newspaper life.

The Hawaii Tribune-Herald, unlike the Honolulu Advertiser and Star-Bulletin, asks internet users to register with the newspaper before they allow you to read the news (and advertisements) on their newspaper web site. It doesn’t cost anything to register other than some effort to come up with a unique Member ID (thereby becoming a ‘member’ of the Herald-Tribune, with whatever benefits may ensue), a password, a valid email address, a zip code, and a year of birth. If you’re under 13 you can’t register with the Tribune Herald’s web site.

The question has to be asked. Why? The Herald-Tribune says the benefits of registration include the opportunity to read the entire Tribune-Herald web site. That part should be obvious since it’s a requirement. But why does the newspaper require readers to register?

Other than allowing internet users to read the newspaper online, what benefit is there to the reader who registers?

Many newspapers have yet to understand how to use their internet editions because they’re stuck in the ‘newspaper business’ instead of being sources for news. The ‘newspaper business’ makes money by selling atoms which give access to the news. It’s big money. It’s been that way for a few hundred years.

For the most part, an internet newspaper doesn’t have any atoms to sell, what with the internet being made up mostly of electricity and bits and bytes. How does a newspaper make money with an internet version of the newspaper? Can they charge internet readers 50-cents a day, or a monthly subscription fee? That business model hasn’t worked too well on the internet, where pretty much everything you read is free (except for access to the internet).

It’s advertising that supports the ancient newspaper business model. Newspapers charge a bundle for the ads, distributed to readers in atom form. Unfortunately, newspapers cannot make as much money selling ads on their internet web sites, so the bit form of the newspaper suffers like an ugly stepchild.

Interestingly, readership of most internet newspapers has increased over the past decade, while readership of the physical newspaper, made up of atoms, has remained stagnant or dropped.

Atoms vs. bits. Which one will win the war?

According to a news report and a survey, the most literate U.S. cities are Minneapolis and Seattle. I wonder why?

Could it be that Seattle and Minneapolis have a high literacy rate because both cities are on the geographic edge of nowhere, blessed with forgettable weather, so residents there have nothing better to do than sit inside, sip coffee, and read?

That’s my guess.

That theory makes Hawaii look like an illiterate state, which may not be far from the truth. Take the best possible late spring day in either Seattle or Minneapolis– warm breeze, blue skies, temperature around 80-degrees– and compare it to Hawaii.

We have about 330 such days every year. By that standard, Hawaii is an illiterate state.

Instead of sitting around sipping Starbucks and listening to the rain fall and towels mold, as they do in Seattle, or instead of sitting around the fireplace in Minneapolis trying to figure out the season (hint– three of them have the word ’snow’ in the definition), people in Hawaii almost live outside.

Outside means parks and playgrounds, beach and surf, hiking, sports, walks, runs and all those things that seem to prevent literacy.

Hawaii seems to have an inordinate number of traffic deaths by wheel. Whether the wheels of mopeds, motorcycles, and loose nuts behind the steering wheel, too many young people are dying on Hawaii’s roads.

It doesn’t take much effort to become a traffic statistic and die on a moped. The state doesn’t require a specific license for moped riders as it does for motorcycles, and based on the consistent number of deaths for both, I’m convinced that a moped riders license test would not matter.

Wheels of death seem to ensnare a disproportionate number of Hawaii young people. What can be done to stop the carnage?

I propose more carnage. Television advertising extolls the pleasures of owning a car, a truck, a motorcycle. Young people are influenced by advertising. Let’s advertise carnage. Even better, let’s teach street and highway carnage in our education system, starting with middle school children.

The schools are a perfect place to show children the results of accidents. Photos and videos of broken bodies, and bloodied, lifeless faces of the injured, dead, and dying, inflicted upon those nearing legal driving age would instill a more profound respect for the privilege of driving responsibly and safely.

Too harsh? Too extreme? Try a program of visual carnage education in half a dozen high schools and measure the results. If traffic accidents involving students in the trial schools goes down, expand the program to other schools.

What’s the harm? Too much violence, blood, and guts for young minds? Please. Do you know what children see on television and in movies theaters?

Most of Hawaii’s islands have too many vehicles and not have enough roads. Each year, tens of thousands of new vehicles hit the local streets and highways without a corresponding increase in roads to handle the traffic. The result is constant gridlock.

With the exception of a few hundred acres of lava on the Big Island, Hawaii isn’t getting any bigger. Even if money were available for construction, where would we put the new roads?

Hawaii’s motorists look to local and state legislators for relief. That’s yet another gridlock.

What wonderful ideas for relieving traffic congestion comes from lawmakers? A fixed rail system for Oahu. Is this 2007 or 1992? How about the new House bill to permit the private sector to build roads that the state cannot afford?

It’s not that the state cannot afford to build more roads. Politicians would need to raise taxes to fund construction. In the end, no new roads, more vehicles, more gridlock.

Wait. Did I understand representative Rida Cabanilla’s bill correctly? The private sector can build roads? Uh huh. Sure. Somebody still has to pay for construction and ongoing maintenance, right? If not the state, then whom and how?

Two words. Toll roads.

It won’t last, but news of Hawaii these days is all about Warrior football, and it’s likely to stay that way until January 1, 2008 when Hawaii beats Georgia in the Sugar Bowl.

Google “hawaii news” to see how much the news is dominated by the University of Hawaii’s football Warriors, quarterback Colt Brennan, and head coach June Jones.

Dozens of headlines in publications all over the country tout the underdog status of the Warriors, Brennan, and Jones. The New York Times, ESPN, The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Philadelphia Daily Neews, Fox News, Sporting News, even the International Herald Tribune in France all carry the amazing Hawaii story.

When will it end? Soon. Win or lose, Hawaii’s top story for 2007 (and the first day of 2008) will be the Warriors of the University of Hawaii, the only major college football team with a perfect record.

What will Hawaii’s news be after the Warriors fall off the front page headlines? It will be back to the usual assortment of daily news– weather, tourism, traffic, politics, education, and crime.

I can see it coming. It won’t be a surprise. Mother nature meets Super Ferry. Storms and rough seas will manage to do what so-called environmentalists could not do. Dock the Super Ferry.

Imagine a scenario like this. You book you, your family, and your car for a trip to Maui and a trip back. The Super Ferry lugs you to Maui, you have a good time for a few days, but the ferry godmother brings a storm and rough seas so the return trip from Maui to Oahu is cancelled.

When was the last  time that happened to Hawaiian Air or Aloha Airlines passengers?

If the Super Ferry were sailing at near full capacity canceling a trip or two between neighbor islands could be cause for grief as passengers and vehicles get backed up for days.

Unless…

Will Super Ferry run a late night ‘make up’ voyage between the islands to pick up stranded passengers, luggage and vehicles?

The only constant in Hawaii is change. Patti’s Chinese Kitchen at Ala Moana Center will close in January, another victim of change in a constantly changing world.

Our family dined at Patti’s many times in decades past, though seldom in recent years.

Why? Panda Express.

Panda’s prices are very competitive, the Chinese food is more consistently tasty and warm, and the lines move quickly and efficiently. It’s not that Patti’s was a bad place to dine on Chinese fast food. Panda is a better dining experience.

Of course, dining at Ala Moana Center’s food court, the so-called Makai Market, is anything but a fine dining experience. Quick service, low price, tasty and filling food. That’s all anyone really wants.

The Hawaii of the past cannot compete with the Hawaii of the present. Local business has difficulty competing with large mainland companies. Gone are Iida’s, McInerny, Carol & Mary, Honolulu Book Shops, and now Patti’s.

These days, mainland visitors require fast food from a name brand, and Panda Express is the McDonald’s of Chinese fast food. Local residents are not immune to the changes in brand preference. After all, Pizza Hut is Honolulu’s favorite pizza restaurant, replacing the once favored local pizza joints. Remember Magoo’s Pizza? Who’s next?